Jantung kita

Jantung ini...

Masih berdetak cepat kala menuliskan balasan candamu

Masih berdetak liar ketika menanti tawamu

Masih terlalu berat mengubahnya menjadi biasa

Masih tetap berubah lambat dan sesak ketika berlinangan karnamu

Masih sesak dan hendak berhenti ketika manyadari ketiadaan

Masih berdetak sepersekian detik dengan menyebut nama depanmu

Masih menggetarkan harapan akan kebersamaan

Pada akhirnya

Jantung ini..

Tetap berdetak tanpa henti..

Saampai akhir..

Dan membangunkanku..

Membuatku memahami bahwa jantung kita...

tidak pernah berdetak beriringan...

wahai bintang tawa

Wahai engkau... yang namanya tak pernah ku gaungkan
Yang bahkan wajahpun kini tlah samar di ingatanku
Namun...
Kisah yang hangat akan dirimu bintang
Yang tetap hidup dalam jiwa yang kini telah lelah
Lelah mendendangan lagu yang tak pernah terdengar
Lelah menyunggingkan tawa yang yang hanya hambar
Lelah menanti kau yang tak dapat kembali kuraih...

kehidupanku

Mata yang selalu menerawang
Kehidupan yang kadang berhenti sejenak
Mengambang..
Gamang..
Berlanjut namun dalam kekalutan
Di dalam hati dan kepala yang kosong
Tak pernah menyatu dan menghasilkan sesuatu
Menjalani segalanya
Memikirkan yang tak seharusnya dipikirkan
Mengingat yang seharusnya tak diingat
Dan menangisi yang seharusnya tak ditangisi
Apa mungkin aku seperti ini selamanya
Memandang slalu kepada terawang dan gamang 
Atau jalan lain harus ku lalui
Tapi apa..

Gamang hati

Melihat...
Membaca...
Merasa...
Bertanya pada hati yang gamang
Lelah hidup tanpa hasrat yang menggebu
Tiada kisah istimewa yang membakar semangat
Menjalani segala hal yang terlihat indah dan menyenangkan
Sejatinya...
Dia bimbang akan apa yang seharusnya ia genggam
Apa yang seharusnya tak lagi membuatnya muram
Di detik demi detik yang termakan
Hingga tahun demi tahun yang ia habiskan
Kisahnya masih senada
Mencari arah dan jati diri
Sampai kapan...
Dan kisah ini akan berakhir?
Atau...

aku

Karna aku tak mau
Mendengar
Melihat 
Dan merasakan
Aku memejamkan mata
Memutar musik sekeras yang mampu di terima telinga
Dan berhenti memperdulikan sekitar  
Seperti itulah caraku
Seorang gadis dengan segala  kelebihan dan kekurangan
Melawan lelahnya jiwa
Akan kehadiranmu
Menahan rasa sakit yang tak seharusnya ada
Dan menentang dunia yang tak mampu mengalihkan perhatianku
Terhadapmu….

you walk toward me - jin woon - eng version

 this is one of Korean songs, english version of course, so you can understand the lyric clearly, check this out :') :

I see you from across the street
With cold eyes, you look at me
And you walk to me, you walk to me

You spit out words that cannot be taken back
With a small voice, you take all our memories
And rip them apart, rip them apart

Your eyes covered me with the blue ocean
And you spit me back out like white cigarette smoke
As if I'm nothing

Just like a sandcastle crumbling with the waves
Just like our memories were never there
You end it like that

I turn around first and get further from you
Although the tips of my hands are still toward you
I'm getting further, I'm getting further

As I hold in this pain that I cannot endure
I try to close my eyes with the last image of you but...

Your eyes covered me with the blue ocean
And you spit me back out like white cigarette smoke
As if I'm nothing

I see you from across the street
With cold eyes, you look at me
And you walk to me, you walk to me

a few for big smile

It's been a long time since the last time i wrote for this blog. Lately, writing become something that i want to avoid but i can not. It get me sick. All my assignment is related to writing, well... i just want to takes this post to open my heart... a little bit hurting but i still smile... cause its beautiful...

Here is still alive

In the middle of my tight activity

In the middle of so much tasks

something that i want to wipe away

keep being clouds in  my day

something that i can see clearly

but also keep hurting

and never able for me to reach

as hard as i keep them away

it still appear 

looking at something like you

there was a moment

i want you to come back

but life still a life

something that go can never come back again

looking at you from this distance is now enought

i never even brave to give my hand to shakehand

as a friend

cause here still alive although a little

it still hurting

but i smile for everything making you happy

 if it is able...

i want to draw a big smile in your chest

just to show you i am fine

-yheni :)-

Have you ever heard about death legislation? in some circumstances  death is legalize. well just read this... enjoy... :)

Legislation of death is commonly takes for the response of terminal illness, like what Silk and Greenberg wrote in their article. However, it also takes for the punishment of dead murderer as what Royko discussed in his article. The question is, is it deserve for a person or groups to decide who have right to die? I do against those kinds of legislation of death. Everyone has their right to life and struggle it. Not even family or physicians can intervene the right to life.
Once, everyone have right to life. It has stated as the foundation of the international human right. As we can see in some articles above that people who suffered by terminal illness keep struggled for medical care to prolong their life no matter the risk. This is what naturally people have tobdo. Related to that case, some reasons to legalize death caused by bill of medical treatment and hopeless of recovery is irrational. As long as the patient has the desire to continue the medical treatment and fight the disease, all related party should be ready to support.
 Another case for the dead punishment of murderer, I do agree that it should be opposed. Even they did a murdering crime, they still have right to life, they are also still have family that expecting for their existence. If we gave the death punishment to a murderer, then which side that distinguish us with the murderers? Although using more civilize way rather than what the murderer did to the victim, it just causes another family lost their family member and their happiness. There must be more civilized punishment to make them redeem what they have done. 
Second, Family should not intervene in deciding the right to die. For some cases like terminal illness, it cannot be receive that when family agree to stop the medical treatment therefore the patient should stop all the treatment such as medicine and medical device to support their life. If the problem is money, it also cannot be received. Money is something that we can look for, but family, it could not be replaced. To keep the members of family among us must be worth more than anything. What family has to do is to give support to the patient whether material or immaterial.
From physician point of view, when a disease has no hope to be recovered, it is not a wise way to directly decide the patient should die or not. There is still any hope of miracle because we have God. There are also some evident that even thousand years in comma, patient still have possibility to waken up. As wrote by BBC, a man named Jan Grzebski, have woken up after 19 years coma. He was hit by the train accidentally. Even people around them do not convince that he would wake up, but he proved that he wakes up after all. It is because he has great intention for his live and his family.
Death and live was something that must be happened in life. However, to decide someone has right to die or not is not people’s role. What people can do is struggle for life and creates meaningful life whether for themselves or others.

Reference
BBC (2007). Pole Wakes Up from 19-year Coma. taken from http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/6715313.stm [19-05-2012]

Communicative language teaching

Have you ever heard about CLT? I hope my essay about that will be useful. U can check it below. :)

Advantages and Disadvantages of Communicative Language Teaching
Nowadays, Communicative Language Teaching (CLT) method has become one of the basic in Indonesian teaching learning process. The principles of CLT have implicitly included into Indonesia Basic Curriculum, especially in the General Principles of Curriculum Development and combine with another method. “The Goal [of CLT] is to enable students to communicate in the target language.”(Larsen,2000). We can infer that CLT is not only focuses on mastering language elements, but it more emphasizes on the use of the target language communicatively. It has brought many advantages for the improvement of the English education process, however there are also some disadvantages that following.
    The implementation of CLT has brought a lot of advantages for English learning process. One, it stimulates students to improve their ability of using English by themselves. Meaning that, it provides students with assignments that allow them to improve their own ideas about what they are going to talk and how they are going to express that. In this activity, the biggest role of the teacher is to facilitate and maintain the students’ activities. Students work by themselves and communicate with others to overcome the assignment.
CLT also engage their students with realistic communication to reach success on the use of English. It is beneficial because by knowing the use of the communication in the real life, students do not feel that what they are learning is useless. There are real circumstances that related to the use of the language. It brings the real life situation of the native English into classroom activities such as role-play and simulation. As Harmer state, “ The teacher will not intervene to stop the activity and the materials he or she [students] relies on will not dictate what specific language students use either.” (Harmer,2007) It means that teachers let the realistic activity completed, because in the real life, there is no one that intervenes in the middle of conversation just to dictate them the language that should be used.
    Besides the advantages above, there are also some disadvantages of using the CLT method. Using CLT restrict students’ understanding about smaller elements of the language, for instance, grammar and syntax system. As an article that published in the internet by Teaching English For All, it presents one of the disadvantages of CLT:
Some people believe that with CLT there is a danger of focusing too much on oral skills at the expense of reading and writing skills, and that there may be too much focus on meaning at the expense of form. It is felt that there is not enough emphasis on the correction of pronunciation and grammar errors.(English For All, 2011)
We can infer that, delivering of language elements in CLT is only happened through inductive way which students understand them only from specific contextual materials. Teachers do not explain the elements directly, but they include the elements in order to reach function of what they are going to use, such as order, refuse, etc, therefore it sometime left miss understanding in students’ mind. 
    Another disadvantage is that CLT needs longer communicative process. CLT activities need a lot of outputs. But if the students do not have sufficient background or knowledge about the activities, teachers have to provide them models to support the activities of communication.  Therefore, they are able to process the materials to organize their need to communicate what the classroom activities asked. If it compared with the earlier methods such as Grammar Translation Method and Direct method, it needs longer time of learning process. In traditional teaching system, for instance, Grammatical Translation Method, teachers are the one who give materials, whether what the students need is only receive what the teachers are given.
    There are must be advantages and disadvantages following the development of a system or method, like what is happened in CLT. However, the most important thing is to understand how to optimize the advantages and compress the disadvantages properly in order to achieve the general goal, in this case is to reach the well teaching learning process.

 
Reference
Harmer, J (2007). The Practice of English Language Teaching. England: Longman.
Larsen, D. Freeman (2000). Techniques and Principles in Language Teaching. New York: Oxford
Teaching English 4 All (2011). Communicative Language Teaching (CLT) and the Post -Method Era. Retrieved from http://teachingenglish4all.wordpress.com/2011/04/22/communicative-language-teaching-clt-and-the-post-method-era/ [accessed 29/04/2012]

tugas ku per 7/04/2012

"ane tadi ngerjain tugas writing,, ya sesuai dengan jurusan saya ya tulusannya temanya kaya begini. buat kalian siapa tau ada yang berbelaskasih mau baca ya silahkan,,, siapa tau bermanfaat... amin..." :D

                     

One of the teacher’s role is as a facilitator, therefore they should be able to give feedback on student’s work both in proper ways and proper quantity, therefore teacher can provide students to know how their work did and what they have to do relate to that. Students’ mistakes usually happened both on written or oral work. But here, we are focus on some different ways of giving feedback in the students’ written work. As Harmer mentioned in his book ‘the way we give feedback on writing will depend on the kind of writing task the students have undertaker, and the effect we wish to create’(Harmer, 2007). We have to distinguish whether student is doing controlled testing activity or more creative writing written work such as stories, letters, reports, etc. On the constructed writing work, you just need to mention right or wrong. However, on creative written work, you can response, correcting, and do students exchange work to give the feedback to them.

In the writing work teacher can give response of students work through comment. You can comment about how students work and any necessary thing about that work, therefore they will be realizing their lack by themselves. Write it out of the body of students work. David Nunan said ‘ When writing short comments, we tend to leave out the words that soften our message’(Nunan,2003). Teacher cannot give comment that sounds unkind.

Another way, you can mark the part where the students did wrong. But, teachers do not directly correct it by writing the correct one. They can just let the mark on so that student will identify more about what is wrong with that. Or u can also use symbol. According to David Nunan, ‘If you write comment on students’ papers, make sure they understand the vocabulary or symbols that you use. Take time to discuss them in class.’(Nunan,2003). Those symbols will help students to be focus of what they have to be more concern about.

The last way of giving feedback is through students’ correction. Students exchange their work and attempt to correct one another. It will increase their awareness of another student’s mistakes so that it will reflect to themselves when they are writing their paper on the other time. Harmer stated that ‘ The more we encourage them to involved in giving feedback to other, or to evaluate their own work successfully, the better they will be able to develop as successful writer.’(Harmer,2007)

Actually, all the ways of giving feedback is essential to correct the students work and increase their ability of language acquisition. However if it is not be given appropriately, sometimes it can become a boomerang that can discourage or even kill your students’ enthusiastic of the learning process. Therefore, to manage it well is become crucial.

OUTLINE

Topik : Feedback

1.      Topic sentence

Some ways of giving feedback on students‘ creative written work

2.      Supporting detail

a.       Response

-          Comment students work

-          Do not giving students unkind comment

b.      Correcting

-          Marking students mistakes

-          Giving code

c.       Involving students

-          Students exchange works

-          Increase self correctness

3.      Conclusion

Personal remark

monyet monyel... :)

kalian tau dia nggak?? minimal pernah liat kek...  Dia ini namanya yoyo monkey. Dia punya pasangan karakter yang wujudnya mirip sama dia tapi cewek. Namanya Cici. Ceritanya siy mereka pacaran, tapi hubungan yang mereka bangun seperti apa kita kan juga nggak tau... hahahaha...:) tingkah si yoyo ini selalu aneh2 dan ngegemesin.... yang atas sendiri tu... dia lagi menyamar jadi Jack Sparow... dan ketauan banget orang pipinya tambun gitu...  yang ke dua,, liat tu muka paniknya gara-gara ketauan lagi manjat and nyuri pisang. dimakan di pohon pula... hahaaha.. awas jatooh... yang ketiga itu dia sedang terbang di atas  kota dan menjadi  supermonkeyman.. matanya belo banget kena angin.. yang ke empat ni... sapa bilang yang doyan duit cuma koruptor,, yoyo juga kalo pegang duit mukanya langsung kelihatan brutal gitu... :D yang terakhir, dia kepengaruh tu sama vampir modern jaman sekarang... kaya Edward Cullen gitu... dan dia malah takut masuk ke rumahnya sendiri... hahaha dia emang lucu ya,,,, tapi segini dulu aja ya.... nanti kalo ada tambahan tentang cerita si monyet lucu ini bakal aq posting lagi... makasi..... :)

someday

begin to walk

but keep looking for the direction

already on your way

but desperate of anything which run

what exacly you want to reach

now you in the middle of no where

crying by your self 

covered by the shadow

clouds spread in your mind

empty sharpen your sorrow

slow your step

keep hanging that dream that you never found

wishing that someday the real dream will come

Dipikiranku ini, selalu aja terlintas pertanyaan, gimana cara kita menghasilkan sebuah tulisan yang  bermutu? soalnya tiap aku baca lagi tulisanku itu berasa nggak ada gregetnya. oke mungkin salahku sendiri nggak banyak baca. Membaca itu sering membuatku dying. Tapi memang seperti ini lah aku. Aku nggak pengen baca terlalu banyak karena pasti apa yang aku baca akan banyak mempengaruhi tulisan. Jadi jati diri tulisanku sendiri itu akan sulit di temukan. Dan aku bukanlah seorang yang hanya suka membaca satu jenis bacaan saja. Jadi aku sendiri suka bingung mau nulis apa, mulainya dari mana dan gimana nyetop nya. Anyone can help me? please give me a hand! Bagaimana membuat tulisan yang bermutu?

bahagia

Setiap orang pasti memiliki kebahagiaan masing- masing. apa yang membuat mereka bahagia, siapa yang memberikan kebahagiaan, dan seperti apa kebahagiaan itu setiap orang mengartikannya dengan berbeda-beda. tawa yang lepas, tangis haru, bahkan hanya segaris senyum pun selalu mewakili entah kebahagiaan seperti apa yang sedang mereka rasakan. hal yang mungkin bagi kita hanya sepele pun kadang akan sangat membahagiaan bagi orang lain.

Kadang aku tak mengerti, ketika aq melihat kebahagiaan orang lain, aku merasa iri, namun di waktu bersamaan aq juga merasa bersyukur. karena aku jadi mengerti apa yang membuatku bahagia. Mungkin memang berbeda dengan kebahagiaan yang mereka rasakan setelah mencapai obsesi mereka, mencapai ketenaran, mendapatkan apa yang mereka impikan. yang lebih berharga untuk hatiku adalah kebahagiaan mereka. Orang- orang yang sungguh aq  sayangi. Keluarga, dan para sahabat. 

Tempatku kembali setelah lelah mengejar mimpi, tempatku meletakkan tubuhku ketika lelah dan penat menghampiri. Tempatku pulang, rumah hatiku adalah keluargaku. seburuk apapun yang terjadi di dalamnya, itu adalah indah bagi kepingan kepingan yang menempatinya. Ibu, Ayah, Adik, dan Kakak. Nenekku tersayang. Tak satupun boleh pergi. Karena aku takkan mampu tanpa kalian, kehidupan yang keras akan terasa ringanjika itu bersama kalian. Bersama kalian di kehidupan ini adalah hal yang takkan pernah kusesali.Bahagia adalah ketika tetap menjaga kalian bersama dalam hati ini dan melihat senyum kalian setiap saat. :)

Sebagian orang bersahabat dengan semua orang, tapi aku bukanlah satu dari mereka. sahabat bagiku adalah mereka yang bahagia bersamaku, dan ketika menangispun adalah akan menjadi bahagia ketika kita bersama. ketika tangis sedih kalian meledak, dan menggenggam tangan kalian, menguatkan hati kalian, dan meyakinkan kalian bahwa ini takkan menjadi lebih buruk adalah dimana kebahagian terbesar memiliki kalian. Mengkin aku hanya bisa memberikan hati dan tenaga, tapi mungkin hanya itulah yang dapat aku tawarkan agar kalian mau menerimaku. Dan sekarang ada di tengah tengah kalian adalah kebahagian yang sungguh berharga. :)

mungkin aq tak mengambil begitu banyak gambar kalian sebagai kenangan, namun semua telah terekam di hatiku layaknya sebuah film yang endingnya adalah kebahagiaan yang tidak pernah berakhir.:)

_yhenisiwiutami_

new year new happiness

a little happiness in that first second in 2012... :)
bersama mereka, teman teman terdekatku, kita tertawa bersama,,, menyambut datangnya kehidupan baru, tahun yang baru,,, menyambut kebahagiaan kebahagiaan baru,,, dan menghapus semua kesedihan dan luka di tahun lalu,,, melihat semua kembang api yang bertebaran di langit gelap itu bagaikan melihat kebahagiaan yang tidak terkira di tengah gelapnya kehidupan... seakan menahan tangis,,, mata ini berkaca-kaca betapa bahagianya aku masih mampu merasakan bahagia dan mendapt kesempatan untuk menapaki hidup di tahun yang baru... merasa betapa bodohnya aq menghabiskan waktuku dengan tangis dan kesedihan... orang orang disekelilingku bisa bahagia... aku pun harus bisa bahagia.... menjadi satu satunya orang yang bersedih akan lebih menyakitkan... di tahun yang baru ini,,, aku siap menerima segala kebaikan dan kegembiraan baru... dari mereka yang tulus dan sayang padaku.... 

nonsense

mungkin aq emang ngga bisa merangkai kata sebaik dan se indah mereka. mengungkapkannya perasaan dalam sebuah tulisan tidak terlihat indah ketika yang kau baca adalah tulisanku. tapi aku hanya mencoba menulis dengan jujur dan tulus. pemilihan kata yang aku ambil mungkin berantakan dan tanpa rima. membangkitkan sense atau minat untuk membaca tulisankupun aq masih sangat merasa kesulitan. sedangkan aku sendiri tidak terlalu suka membaca segala sesuatu yang terlalu banyak dan membuatku pusing sejak awal, tapi aku berusa memperbaiki setiap tulisan yang aku buat. belajar yang bisa kulakukan dalam menulis hanya seperti ini. lebih sering menulis apa yang saya inginkan secara mengalir dan jarang memikirkan harus diletakkan dimana yang ini atau yang itu. hanya smengalir layaknya air jernih di sungai dangkal. menuliskan segala sesuatu yang lugas pun sulit, apa lagi yang tersurirat.... but i just want to show anything in my mind.

when you are in love

When you are in love

It is ok to get gurt if it makes you smile

It is ok to secerfy if it helps you

It is ok to be stupid if it is you the one brihter

It is ok to let go if it is hapiness for you

It is ok to be alone if you are minglefull

Anything for your happiness J

first time for you mom.. :*

yesterday,,, pertamakalinya dan gue juga nggak ngerti kenapa bisa gue nangis di jalanan dari ruma menuju kosan... hmmm.. hal yang sangat aneh... entah karena mood saya lagi jelek atau emang gara-gara kepikiran emak saya... hehehe...

yang jelas  beberapa hal yang saya pikirkan waktu itu adalah...

o... i have to be as strong as my mother... syukur kalo bisa lebih kuat dari beliau dan mampu menguatkannya di setiap letihnya,,, bisa terus  menjadi tempat beliau bercerita ketika penat dan keluhnya tak lagi mampu ia tahan sendiri.... cause i have another purpose of life but make our beloved family happy...

o... i have to make her proud someday... i am relize... that since this day i do nothing for her... yang bisa saya lakukan hanya meminta uang dan memintanya memenuhi kebutuhan harian saya,,, dan apa yang saya berikan padanya terkadang justru kekecewaan,,,, dan yang bisa saya lakukan sekarang hanya membantunya dalam segala hal kecil,,, mencuci, menyau,,,dll.... itu hanya hal kecil yang baginya ringan,,, namun akan lebih meringankan kehidupannya lagi jika beliau tidak perlu melakukannya lagi...and some day i'll make her just stay at the chair in my feranda and relax while averything is fixed by me...

o... i can't do without her.... i have life with her for 18 years and i never imagine if she is not beside me anymore... semua pelukannya,, air matanya entah bahagia atau sedih,,, senyum dan tawa beliau... segala hal kecil yang tidak akan mungkin saya lewatkan hari saya tanpa itu.... seluruh kasih sayangnya.... jika itu tanpanya... dunia adalah kegelapan,,,,

o...hoping for her healthyness and patientness... my family's life is not as easy as people tought.... dan ibunda saya lebih sering menahan segala perasaannya dalam hatinya... kekecewaan,,, kesedihan,,, keputus asaan nya akan segala kekurangan dalam keluarga ini,,,, dan harapan saya adalah neliau akan terus mampu bersabar dan kuat menghadapi segalanya,,, saya akan menjadi satu satunya orang yang terus mendukungnya ketika tak ada satupun orang yang mendukungnya... 

Dan semua air matanya yang tertahan,,, ketika itu berlinang... saya hanya ingin mengusapnya dan berada di pelukannya sebagai anaknya yang ada untuk beliau ketika tak ada satupun anggota keluarga lain yang mendengar jerit hatinya,,, ad all i want to say is...Allah,,, keep her in health and patient... cause if it is without her,,, i dont know how my life would be... :* _hug n kiss for my beloved mom_ :')

how is it

i have decide for a new life
but it is still only you inside my head
i have want to forget you
but you still anywhere without i want
the time in frustation
how is it only you the man i want
it is still difficult if it is without thingking of you
i have stop every real things from you
but my heart and dream never can stop from remembering you
#shit
_yheni_

im back

it's been a while since my last post. i had struggle for my heart survival since my bad time after get broken. too much tears i waste, so much time i waste in emptyness,, but now i start to back to the reality. Unfortunately bitter reality that he is totally not mine anymore. i already woken up from my bad dream i made. all the dark shadows fade slowly but sure. And now i am ready for my new life and write again. my empty heart will fillfull again along the time.